Being a child isn’t easy.
We sometimes compare our own childhoods to the life children have now, and it seems like it’s full of luxury. They get to do things and experience things we didn’t even dream of. Phones are miles away from what was available twenty years ago, and other devices and technology seem incredible when you compare them to what used to be around.
But modern childhood is also very stressful. Most children now experienced some of their formative years in lockdown, which means that they spent at least a year unable to properly associate with friends and family. They also have threats and concerns that simply didn’t exist when we were children.
How can parents identify when their children are struggling, and how can we help?
Spend Time With Your Child
One of the most obvious ways to be more aware of your child’s experiences is to spend time with them.
In recent years, the “iPad kid” has reigned supreme. Parenting is difficult, so it’s easy to just stick your kid in front of a screen and keep them distracted. But this isn’t spending time with your child. You’re both ignoring each other and focusing on separate screens.
Instead, parents should spend time talking to their kids and doing things with them. Don’t let screen time become the default parent.
If your kid likes gaming, then play video games with them. Show them your hobbies. Go for walks, try gardening, play sports, go out for the day, whatever. The activity itself isn’t as important as the time you spend together.
When you spend time with your child, you get to know their baseline. You get used to talking to each other and, if something changes with them, you will notice it.
Warning Signs
Of course, children aren’t a constant. They change as they grow. But there’s a difference between normal development, including teenage grumpiness, and the warning signs of mental health issues or even abuse.
Any drastic change in behaviour is a cause for concern. Your child might become more withdrawn and quiet. They might stop doing things they used to enjoy. On its own, this could be them changing their interests as they grow, but if your child also seems to change other behaviour, it could be a sign of depression or anxiety.
In some cases, children actually seem more outgoing. They might act more aggressively and, in cases of sexual abuse, they could even act inappropriately for their age.
It can be a good idea to read up about cases of abuse, especially if your child is involved in a religious or community organization. You can find Father James M. Ray case details online, as well as other cases.
The Importance of Being Approachable
What if you do notice these warning signs?
One of the best ways parents can protect their children is to be approachable. Children can be afraid to talk about abuse or other concerns because they think they’ll get into trouble.
If you make it clear that your children can talk to you about anything, and set a pattern, they’ll find it easier to come to you for help. Even older teenagers will fall back to the support of their parents when they need to, as long as you make it clear that they have the option.